light at the end???

i am feeling relief now. the appraiser just left & everything seemed to go really well. the kitchen is a non-issue. whew! i told him about all the new stuff we had done to the house & what we planned to do in the spring (ie- new roof).

he was a lovely gentleman who has a 2 year old daughter at home. my dogs loved following him around for the 15 minutes he was in the house- fascinated by his equipment for measuring the house. (despite the fact they have seen me 3,000 times with a tape measure!)

yesterday was bad. badder than bad. remember when i mentioned my hatred for a certain phone company? (hint- it starts with an 's' and ends with a 'print') well- it is renewed. after countless phone calls & e-mails & despite having worked out that i would pay their craptastic large bill over time (since they didn't even get me an itemized copy of it until late december...) they have sent me to collections. to an evil harassing collections that calls you multiple times a day. so now i am back to calling & e-mailing the hideous evil corporation to see why the fuck they did that? and to make them stop it. if i get the refi i'll pay them off & be done with it. if not- they have to stick with the payment plan option (which is all of 2 freaking payments!) but this is a blip. an annoyance compared with what happened next. this i can (and actually already have) deal with.

next up was crazy mil time. i can't get into details (how i wish blogger could pp certain posts!) but it was bad. long story short- i had her invited to my shower (which by the way i love my friends- more on that later, but apparently they sent out perfect invitations. i won't see one until the day- i only know time & day & place since it's at my house- otherwise i am completely out of it) which was apparently a personal attack of some sort. there were several heated e-mails with many upsetting & deliberately hurtful things sent. i responded as best i could (not being a wallflower, but not sinking to saying mean -if true- things to hurt her like she hurt me- man this belief in karma really is hard sometimes!) in the end i said what i wanted to say & left an open invitation to either come to the shower, or to visit when the babe is born. she & the hub are still not speaking- mainly because the hub is really upset by how she has dragged me into their fight & the things she has said to me. so i let her know that if that's still the case in 3 months then she can visit while he's at work. of course- my mom or sis will probably be here then too- but that's fine. i may want the moral support depending on how things progress - or don't- until then!

all in all it was a very upsetting day made just that much worse by the anxiety caused by this appraisal & so much of our future financial comfort hinging on one day. i still don't know what we are looking at, but i am feeling slightly more confident & more relaxed that we will in fact be okay.

the poor hub is a wreck today- i couldn't sleep well last night & while i can go back to sleep after tossing and turning- he can't. so my poor sleep actually wakes him up & he is stuck being awake at 3am. he has to go to work for 8am so he is pretty beat today. tonight i think we are going to just get a movie and relax at home. i think we have earned it!